This week has gone by really fast and it's been a lot better then last week. Last week went by so slowly and was so horrble :( The only bad thing about this week was Thursday and Friday.
My mum just said to me "Amy, why can't you just be normal?". A bit harsh I think. Why would I want to be normal anyway? Normal is boring and like everyone else. I want to be unique and different! She desperately wants me to be a normal girl. The ones with normal coloured hair, that like normal pop music, wearing skirts and dresses, who's hobbies are putting makeup on her mum and doing her hair and watch old and depressing TV programmes like 'Little house on the Prairie' with her.
Give me a break, like I'll ever be like that. I've got to feel bad for her though, when she expected a baby girl I'm sure she expected someone girly and feminine. And here she is with a bitchy, tom boyish, stroppy, emo, Anarchist who enjoys Rock music and is obsessed with Vampires. No wonder she wants me to change so bad, but it just isn't going to happen.
I'm thinking of writing a book or something. I've got nothing better to do here and it's a way to kill time untill I come back to Bexhill and see all my friends and actually be happy. Sounds good but I'm just too lazy to do it. But if I were to write a book it would be on Vampires for sure!
Friday, 13 March 2009
Thursday, 5 March 2009
What a Shame
What I need to remember:
JUST BECAUSE somebody flirts with you, doesn't mean they like you
JUST BECAUSE somebody likes you, doesn't mean they want to go out with you.
JUST BECAUSE somebody wants to go out with you, doesn't mean they love you.
JUST BECAUSE somebody loves you, doesn't mean they won't hurt you.
JUST BECAUSE somebody flirts with you, doesn't mean they like you
JUST BECAUSE somebody likes you, doesn't mean they want to go out with you.
JUST BECAUSE somebody wants to go out with you, doesn't mean they love you.
JUST BECAUSE somebody loves you, doesn't mean they won't hurt you.
I'm Falling to Pieces
It's ironic how when you're lonely, the entire world seems to be in love.
After breaking up with George (For the second time :/) I'm actualy really lonely again. So is a number of other people I've been talking to, but the one thing they said helps is music.
I agree with that, music does make you feel a lot better but sometimes it just makes the situation a lot worse. Like, if you listen to depressing music 8 out of 10 times you're going to end up even more depressed.
I don't get life, theres really no point. I guess we're just made to make babies and fight over land. I hate that money was invented, I get the point of it and I suppose the system sort of works.. in a twisted way.. but I just hate it. Why can't everything be fair? :(
Well anyway, on to love. Although I'm only 15 I really think I have experienced love. And it's horrible. I suppose I've only discovered the bad not-being-loved-back love though.
George said he loved me. I hate it when you find the perfect guy who genuinly loves you and wants to be with you forever, and you just dont feel the same way anymore. I have no idea whats wrong with me. It's like the only way I love them is if they refuse to love me. Why are girls like this? We're incapable of taking our eyes off the ones that wont love, and ignore the ones that are willing to love.
I'd love to meet my soul mate.. I honestly believe that there is someone for everyone out there who we were meant to be with.. like an other half. I like the idea of that, it's sweet. I'm only 15 but I'm already tired of trying to win other boys affections when they clearly don't want me. I'd love to meet my soul mate now. Though, then I'd have nothing to look for and be happy with when I'm older. Life is going to be so boring and I'm terrified of growing up :( I could party all my life and stay with my friends.. that would make me very happy. But then.. what else? There has to be more to life then just babies, money and friends.
Teenage emotions suck. Thank god we only have to go through this for like, 10 years. The only thing left after this to look forward to is a midlife crisis. That'll be fine though, I'll just buy a sports car or get a tattoo or something.
After breaking up with George (For the second time :/) I'm actualy really lonely again. So is a number of other people I've been talking to, but the one thing they said helps is music.
I agree with that, music does make you feel a lot better but sometimes it just makes the situation a lot worse. Like, if you listen to depressing music 8 out of 10 times you're going to end up even more depressed.
I don't get life, theres really no point. I guess we're just made to make babies and fight over land. I hate that money was invented, I get the point of it and I suppose the system sort of works.. in a twisted way.. but I just hate it. Why can't everything be fair? :(
Well anyway, on to love. Although I'm only 15 I really think I have experienced love. And it's horrible. I suppose I've only discovered the bad not-being-loved-back love though.
George said he loved me. I hate it when you find the perfect guy who genuinly loves you and wants to be with you forever, and you just dont feel the same way anymore. I have no idea whats wrong with me. It's like the only way I love them is if they refuse to love me. Why are girls like this? We're incapable of taking our eyes off the ones that wont love, and ignore the ones that are willing to love.
I'd love to meet my soul mate.. I honestly believe that there is someone for everyone out there who we were meant to be with.. like an other half. I like the idea of that, it's sweet. I'm only 15 but I'm already tired of trying to win other boys affections when they clearly don't want me. I'd love to meet my soul mate now. Though, then I'd have nothing to look for and be happy with when I'm older. Life is going to be so boring and I'm terrified of growing up :( I could party all my life and stay with my friends.. that would make me very happy. But then.. what else? There has to be more to life then just babies, money and friends.
Teenage emotions suck. Thank god we only have to go through this for like, 10 years. The only thing left after this to look forward to is a midlife crisis. That'll be fine though, I'll just buy a sports car or get a tattoo or something.
Monday, 9 February 2009
Girl I Know
Wow, so I'm going back to Bexhill for a week in half term and I am amazingly hyped up for it :) I can't wait to go back and see my friendsss!! Seriously, they are AMAZING friends! I couldn't live without them and I mean that!You think your friends are good? Well mine are better, seriously you will never have better friends then mine! :DThey're are BEYOND amazing! And I am so looking forward to raping them again!
Snow Days-
So it's been snowing a lot lately right? At first I thought that was amazing news ! Since I haven't seen snow in years and it means I get days off school.. whats not to love? But I've realised the consequences of my ache for the frozen rain which ices the town so beautifully :)Just think of all the accidents snow has caused.. its killed a lot of people. It's like love.. it's beautiful for a while but in the end it just turns cold and bitter. Pretty grim view on snow and love I guess but it's just an example. But yeah, snow kills a lot of people.. which is bad evidently.So I started feeling guilty for wishing snow would visit :/ The other bad thing about snow is frost bite ! Ouch much! It's weird to think your body can get so cold that your body parts could just snap off so easily.. it's also pretty gross. I guess theres more bad things to snow then good things,but I still love it <3
Careers-
Okay, heres what I wan't to be when I'm older. I wan't to be a journalist and interview famous people ! It seems like an awesome plan ! Meet your idols and get to know them better AND get paid for it? Yes please xD But yeah, if that fails I have decided that I will gain about 20 stone and be one ofthose women that sit on men and get paid for a living. It's so odd! The way some men have that fetish of being sat on by extremely fat women... why on earth would you pay for that?! Order a Thai bride and get it for free ! But yeah the fat-sitting-on-men plan is my backup option.. and hopefully it won't come to that :)
Snow Days-
So it's been snowing a lot lately right? At first I thought that was amazing news ! Since I haven't seen snow in years and it means I get days off school.. whats not to love? But I've realised the consequences of my ache for the frozen rain which ices the town so beautifully :)Just think of all the accidents snow has caused.. its killed a lot of people. It's like love.. it's beautiful for a while but in the end it just turns cold and bitter. Pretty grim view on snow and love I guess but it's just an example. But yeah, snow kills a lot of people.. which is bad evidently.So I started feeling guilty for wishing snow would visit :/ The other bad thing about snow is frost bite ! Ouch much! It's weird to think your body can get so cold that your body parts could just snap off so easily.. it's also pretty gross. I guess theres more bad things to snow then good things,but I still love it <3
Careers-
Okay, heres what I wan't to be when I'm older. I wan't to be a journalist and interview famous people ! It seems like an awesome plan ! Meet your idols and get to know them better AND get paid for it? Yes please xD But yeah, if that fails I have decided that I will gain about 20 stone and be one ofthose women that sit on men and get paid for a living. It's so odd! The way some men have that fetish of being sat on by extremely fat women... why on earth would you pay for that?! Order a Thai bride and get it for free ! But yeah the fat-sitting-on-men plan is my backup option.. and hopefully it won't come to that :)
Monday, 12 January 2009
A bit more serious xD (Yeah it's not a song title whatever)
Woahh it's been a long time since I've wrote.
I have soo many new views on the worrlllddd <3
1) I watched The Young Ones yesterday, I bought the first season because I saw it on TV and it looked interesting, and it sounds weird but Rik Mayalls character 'Rick' in the show has really cool views on the world and the government and I mostly agree with all of them. I know the shows just trying to make fun of him and his views but they're really interesting xD He belives in Anarchism :) 'Anarchism is the political belief that society should have no government, laws, police, or other authority, but should be a free association of all its members'.
I think that idea could work.. apart from the criminals taking advantage of the world on the streets... other then that I totally agree. Tbh I never thought I'd take an interest in politics or anything like that, but I find it quite interesting xD Yes.. I am pretty boring and sad aren't I?
But anyway.
2) This isn't really a view on the world but after watching The Young Ones (Yes I'm too obsessed with this sitcom already), I really like old punk music like Nine below Zero and Madness. (If they're not 'old punk music' then forgive me xD)
3) I have decided what courses to take in Sixth form ! I'm going to take English lit and lang, Media Studies, Photography and Politics (If I can choose 4 courses that is...).
I think I'm going to end up being some sort of journalist when I'm older.. I'd hate to be one of those stalking papparazzi though.. urgh no way.
4) I really wan't to start being more active and less lazy.. I am so unbelievebly lazy and I am so bored of it ! Maybe I should get a hypnotist.. that would work? And it would mean less work for me.. but I guess that means I'm thinking lazy again >.> Either way I can't win!
5) I WILL start writing more letters to my friends and writing more entries for my blog ! I wan't to improve my creativeness god damn it !
Well anyways, I've got to go now because my dad who insists on making my life so complicated by landing chores on me at 10:28 at night, just when I'm about to straighten my hair, has called me downstairs to tidy my xbox room.
Yeah that's right I got an xbox for christmas :)
If anyone wants to add me on xbox live it's: amyholic
Bye :) x
I have soo many new views on the worrlllddd <3
1) I watched The Young Ones yesterday, I bought the first season because I saw it on TV and it looked interesting, and it sounds weird but Rik Mayalls character 'Rick' in the show has really cool views on the world and the government and I mostly agree with all of them. I know the shows just trying to make fun of him and his views but they're really interesting xD He belives in Anarchism :) 'Anarchism is the political belief that society should have no government, laws, police, or other authority, but should be a free association of all its members'.
I think that idea could work.. apart from the criminals taking advantage of the world on the streets... other then that I totally agree. Tbh I never thought I'd take an interest in politics or anything like that, but I find it quite interesting xD Yes.. I am pretty boring and sad aren't I?
But anyway.
2) This isn't really a view on the world but after watching The Young Ones (Yes I'm too obsessed with this sitcom already), I really like old punk music like Nine below Zero and Madness. (If they're not 'old punk music' then forgive me xD)
3) I have decided what courses to take in Sixth form ! I'm going to take English lit and lang, Media Studies, Photography and Politics (If I can choose 4 courses that is...).
I think I'm going to end up being some sort of journalist when I'm older.. I'd hate to be one of those stalking papparazzi though.. urgh no way.
4) I really wan't to start being more active and less lazy.. I am so unbelievebly lazy and I am so bored of it ! Maybe I should get a hypnotist.. that would work? And it would mean less work for me.. but I guess that means I'm thinking lazy again >.> Either way I can't win!
5) I WILL start writing more letters to my friends and writing more entries for my blog ! I wan't to improve my creativeness god damn it !
Well anyways, I've got to go now because my dad who insists on making my life so complicated by landing chores on me at 10:28 at night, just when I'm about to straighten my hair, has called me downstairs to tidy my xbox room.
Yeah that's right I got an xbox for christmas :)
If anyone wants to add me on xbox live it's: amyholic
Bye :) x
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